Skipping Dessert … and taking the stairs

Remember a few years ago when tea was really big?  When it was supposed to be the “new wine,” meaning that overpriced, boutique loose tea leaves were the object of obsession for foodies and wanna-be foodies of the day?  (You don’t remember that?  Just take my word for it.  Stop spoiling the fun.)  I got caught up in that to some extent and was ordering interesting teas from exotic locales fairly regularly.

And then one day, in my loose tea, there was a bug.

A big, dead bug.

Who had crashed and bled-out (or oozed whatever it is dead bugs ooze) onto the tea leaves surrounding it.  Having paid more than anybody should ever pay for this (or any other) tea, I got right on the phone and demanded a refund and an apology, at the very least.  I got neither.  Rather, I was told, basically, “bugs happen.”

And with that, my zest for boutique teas ended.

Every time I read articles like this one I hearken back to that tea experience.  Maggots in your mushrooms? Yep.  Moldy applesauce in your kid’s fruit cup?  You got it!  Salmonella in your gravy mix?  Comin’ right up.

And the FDA, they’re OK with it.  The article is about “repackaging.”  Salvaging “food” that doesn’t meet FDA requirements and changing it in some way so that it does meet minimum safety guidelines.  For instance:

It might be something unappetizing, such as insect parts sifted out of cocoa beans or live bugs irradiated — and left behind — in dried fruits like dates and figs.

Or it could be something alarming, such as the salmonella Tennessee bacteria detected last year in huge lots of hydrolyzed vegetable protein, or HVP, a flavor enhancer used in foods from gravy mix and snack foods to dairy products, spices and soups.   Some 177 products were recalled in 2010, but bulk HVP products from Basic Food Flavors Inc. of Las Vegas, Nev., were allowed to be reconditioned by heat-treating the foods to kill the salmonella, according to the FDA. The reprocessed foods were then distributed and sold.

Now, I’m not here to hack on the FDA.  There are a lot of hard-working scientists and administrators doing the best they can there to keep our food supply safe (and not quite so nasty).  But they are under constant pressure from Big Ag, through political gamesmanship, to soften their rules.  Which plays out in less-safe food for my kids.  And that, friends, Pisses. Me. Off.

Go forth and read the article.   Goodness knows there’s plenty of literature on the topic, from Upton Sinclair to this MSNBC piece.  Come to your own conclusions, but remember, when you make excuses for why it’s OK to defund the FDA or that those mean ol’ federal bureaucrats need to back off small businesses like Con-Agra … it could be you that takes gets a mouthful of e-coli crab.  As the article points out, “If food is adulterated in an unacceptable way, reconditioning won’t fix it,” he said. “You can’t cook the poop out of it.”

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Alrighty then.  Moving on to happier reading, I want you to go read this blog now (and then come right back here).  It’s written by a friend of a friend who has achieved incredible things through diet and exercise.  Her ongoing story and commitment to weight loss is nothing short of phenomenal.  It’s made even more so by the fact that she works as an event planner for an upscale restaurant.  She even tackles the whole being-vegan-at-a-restaurant thing.

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Thanks, as always, for reading.  By the way, those little buttons you see below the post for Facebook, Twitter, etc.?  Those are there so you can share this blog with other people.  I like to write, but I like it even more when lots of people read what I’ve written.

When last I weighed-in, I was at 264.

This morning, back on my regular Friday weigh-in schedule (and with new batteries in the scale) I was … 264.  Which, I suppose, I should be pretty happy about, all things considered.

You see, I’ve been, well, less-than-diligent about my eating.  Not that I was eating all that much more (although I have been eating 10-15 % more than I was in the summer), but I’ve been eating whatever was on the menu instead of demanding my whole grains and such.  Cleaning the plate at the chain restaurants and all that.

And there was that 3/4 of a pecan pie I ate the day after Thanksgiving.

So.  I’ve been given a pass on the last month or so.  That won’t last.  Back on the intentional eating wagon.

And I use the “on the wagon” reference intentionally as well.  While I’ve never been cursed with addiction to alcohol (although for a goodly number of years I wasn’t a particularly responsible drinker), drugs, cigarettes, etc., I’m pretty sure my behavior with food bears a striking resemblance to the sort of thing people often use twelve steps to get past.  Nervous?  Grab a donut.  Excited?  Pizza!  Anxious?  Think I’ll finish this pie.  You get the picture.

This whole losing-weight, living-healthier thing takes constant maintenance.  Not just one day at a time, or even one meal at a time, but one forkful at a time.  When I pay attention – when I eat intentionally – good things happen.  When I don’t, a cardiologist somewhere is getting ready to ring up the cash register.

So, on the wagon it is.  And my running shoes are mocking me, so I need a plan for them as well.

For now, if you’re keeping score at home, that’s 38 weeks, 23 pounds.

Thanks for reading!

Hello?

(tap)

Is this thing on?  I can’t remember if I paid the power bill … oh, look, the lights still work.  How ’bout that.

Jeez, what a mess this place is.  You walk away for a day or two and the cobwebs just get all over everything.

Ok, so it was more than a day or two.  More like thirty days.  Exactly.

Remember October?  “Accountabilitober?”  Good times, right?  Thirty-one posts in thirty-one days.  That was heavier lifting than I thought it would be.

And then 0 for November.  Think of it as “Ovember.”  I’m calling this month “Decemba to Rememba.”  ‘Cause apparently I need pressure to get anything done.

Here, as long as you’re just standing around listening, grab a broom and help me clean this place up.  Roll up your sleeves.  I got a lot of work to do, and I’m gonna give you plenty of assignments too.

I don’t have any good excuses for leaving you without bloggy goodness for the past month, but I’ll still try to make some (excuses, that is).  I’ll confess right up front that the Friday weigh-in isn’t gonna be happy-making.

But I’ve missed this place, and have a lot to say over the next weeks and months.  Turns out I need this blog to keep me on the straight and narrow, or at least to remind where the straight and narrow leads.

Get those dust bunnies over in the corner.  Thanks – here’s the dustpan.

Well, looking a little better.  I’ll be back in on Friday with the weigh-in news, and then back on a Monday, Wednesday, Friday + schedule.  I appreciate so many of you writing to tell me you’ve missed the blog.  I’ll try not to disappoint …  for a few weeks, at least.

Thank you, gentle readers, for sticking with me through the posting marathon that has been October.  Thirty-one days, thirty-one blog posts.  Most of which actually had a little substance, this past Saturday notwithstanding.

I can’t say it’s been particularly helpful in actually losing weight this month, but I suppose if I hadn’t been checking in with y’all every day I might have strayed even further off the path.  Regardless, I’m glad I did it.  Here are some things I learned:

–  Daily deadlines do not improve my writing.

–  Autumn is not the best time for a project like this.  I got a lot goin’ on right now, professionally and domestically.  Maybe I’ll give it another shot in June.

–  There is no shortage of ideas for great blog posts.  There is a shortage of free time.  Sometimes I just want to sit in the recliner and stare at the TV, not turn the computer on at 10 PM.

–  I really like writing this blog, and I like it even more when readership spikes.  And readership spikes when I write really good content and promote that content.  With that in mind, I’m focusing on three posts a week – four if I’m feeling froggy.  Mondays will be your weekly reading assignment, Wednesdays are Five Things Wednesday (because people like lists) and Fridays will be weigh-in.  And I might actually pay attention to letting more people know about the blog.  People who don’t necessarily read the Facebook.  Actually, I could use your help in that.  If you’re reading and enjoying, tell a friend!

So.  Enough whining.  Wednesday back to healthy livin’ talk!

Thanks for reading.

One of the pitfalls of the American diet is the ritual of eating ridiculous amounts of unhealthy food while we watch – or prepare to watch – sports on TV.  Or, in a more developed art form, while we tailgate.

A friend of the blog asks what, if any, changes I’ve made to my sports-watching food rituals as I work on my health.  I’d like to tell you I have some awesome sensible-eating recipes that have replaced the deadly ways of my old-school football pregame activities.

Bad news.   I just don’t eat around sports anymore.

My best routine is breakfast, light snack, lunch, dinner.  When I follow that routine – and make good choices about them – I lose weight.  When I stretch that routine, well, that’s when I plateau … or gain weight.  And that’s not acceptable, folks.

I can’t speak for everyone.  I know some of you have had success with other ways of approaching healthier eating.  Here’s my theory on losing weight:  You gotta make sacrifices.  Substantial ones.  Allow me to elaborate.

I (really) like eating my way through a football game.  I used to (really) like fast food.  Cranberry-orange scones at Starbucks?  Love ’em.  Dessert?  Big fan.

Can’t do that stuff if I want to lose weight.  Just can’t.  If I tried to substitute healthier food for the stuff I used to eat, I’d just eat more of it.  Easier to just not start.  Just watch the game.

That’s how it works for me.  Again, some of you may have success in other ways, but for me, not starting is the best way to control my eating.

Sorry.  College football has taken all the creativity out of me.

… that wouldn’t be particularly honest.  No, this is uphill, and I’m losing ground, according to the scale.  264 today.  That’s up five pounds I’ve gained in two weeks.  On the bright side, it’s 23 pounds in 33 weeks.  But it’s time to get really serious again.

Ugh.

I have bad news for you.  Those five-dollar blended coffee-ish iced drinks you get at the Starbucks?  They’re really bad for you.  And not just in economic terms.

Also, it turns out in addition to making you look like an amateur, frozen mixed drinks will set you back nearly a thousand calories. And not because of the half-shot of Bacardi floating around somewhere in your strawberry “daiquiri.”  Bet you didn’t know “daiquiri” had that many i’s, did you?

And those flavored waters that taste so clean and refreshing?  Yeah, that’s a quick hundred calories or so.

This article, compliments of the ever-vigilant research department here at Skipping Dessert, features eleven drinks that are keeping our nation extra-large.  If you stop and think about any of them, it becomes fairly obvious that they not exactly helpful if you’re trying to shed a pound or fifty, but frankly, stopping and thinking isn’t a common occurrence for many of us.

I mean, you know that no matter how fresh and organic the lemonade is, if it’s sweet enough to drink it’s not helping you lose weight.  This piece will help you remember.

Hey, it’s Five Things Wednesday!  Today, I’m pondering how difficult it must be to be a vegan in western culture.  I’m reasonably sure it’s a healthy way to eat (and I’ll review some information about it for you soon), but I’m also convinced it’s nearly impossible here in the US (or most of Europe) unless you have either unlimited time or unlimited funds available.  Here are five reasons I won’t even try.

1.)  Pariah Status.  Yes, this is something of a cop-out.  But as many funny looks as I get when I tell people I don’t eat dessert, I’m afraid I’d be Baker-Acted if I turned down dairy and eggs.

2.)  I Like Cheese.  I mean, I really like cheese.  I’ve read all the arguments about how humans don’t need dairy after they leave their mother’s own dairy, and about how we’re the only adult mammals who consume dairy.  But we’re also the only mammals who use toilets, so just because the rest of the animal kingdom is behind on this is not a good argument.

3.)  It’s Nearly Impossible to Explain.    I’ve watched vegans try to explain, and most people just don’t get it … unless they’re also vegans. My Lovely Wife, who did some time as a vegan, tells the story of a Spanish family she lived with on a study-abroad trip, who, upon learning she was vegan, kindly removed the chicken from her bowl of soup.  Let’s face it, most people don’t understand vegetarian, much less vegan.

4.)  I’d Have to Move to New York or San Francisco to Eat in a Restaurant.  Seriously.  Check the menu at the next place you eat.  All the non-meat fare has cheese.  An I like to eat somewhere besides home.

5.)  All Beans, All the Time.   I like beans, but not as much as I’m pretty sure I’d need to go vegan.

Yes.  These are all about convenience.  Which is where having time or money on my hands would come in really handy.  I’d be tempted to give it a shot if I had those things.  I don’t, so I cop-out and say, please bring me a nice, lean, nearly-rare filet mignon.

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And by the way, I have tremendous respect for those who are able to pull off the vegan lifestyle.  I just don’t have that much will.

I’m shifting a “trouble with veganism” post from today to five-things-Wednesday.  I got nothin’ but a desk full o’ work today, so while this isn’t much, it’s going to have to do for this last Tuesday in Accountibilitober.

Talk amongst yourselves …